Show 5 - Mindful Teacher, Balanced Life: Taking Back Your Time with Rochelle Tyler

Show Links

Email: askmstyler@gmail.com

Teach and Thrive Facebook Group

Show Transcript

Rochelle

That just that question opened up all these teachers because they're like okay wait so you're feeling that way like when you get home you don't want to talk to your people at your family at home because you have all this stuff so what are you doing differently some teachers are like well I'll just I'll drive the long way home go get a cookie and I'm like really like you do that you know like that's taking time from your kids but they were like well it's um it's so I can prepare myself for home so I can actually leave work where it is.

Shaun

Welcome to the Teacher Money Show. The podcast dedicated to helping Educators like yourself navigate your unique Financial challenges and unlock your financial superpowers. I'm your host Shaun Morgan a full-time teacher and entrepreneur and I'm here to help teachers navigate everything related to your money. Whether you have questions about budgeting on a teacher's salary managing student loans increasing your income or making the most of your benefits I'm here to make money less confusing, more empowering, and a tool you can use to focus on what matters most. So whether you're a seasoned teacher looking for fresh insights or a new educator navigating your first paycheck this podcast is your go-to resource for all things money related. So if you're ready to have a richer wallet classroom and life let's Dive In.

The contents of this podcast are informational in nature and are not legal or tax advice and neither I nor my guests are engaged in the provision of legal tax or any other advice you should not act upon this information without first seeking appropriate advice from an accountant financial planner lawyer or other professional.

Hello and welcome to the Teacher Money Show where we help teachers have a richer wallet classroom and life. So excited to have our guest on today Rochelle is coming on to talk to us just having a fun conversation between teachers and I'm really excited for our topic today we're going to be talking about work life balance which is one of those words that's becoming you know charged word and people have different ideas what it really means and people mean think it means you're being lazy nowadays or anything like that but we're going to talk about what it really means for teacher and why we need it. Sm so Rochelle welcome on the show.

Rochelle

Hi, thanks for having me.

Shaun

We're so excited to have you on so Rochelle let's just Dive Right on in and tell me about yourself and your teaching career.

Rochelle

Oh well um this is my 16th year in education um I started in special ed special ed was fun um actually when I started I was a acting director at a charter school and so it was um it was crazy. Um then I decided to make the move um to change the General Ed math 6th grade seventh grade loved it um it's just that some of my students were like well they're moving too fast. Um then pandemic hit um seventh grade sixth grade online teaching online and then now I am currently an elementary school um math interventionist.

Shaun

That is quite the journey.

Rochelle

Yes yes

Shaun

You've done you've done a little bit of everything.

Rochelle

Oh yes I think I'm a unicorn.

Shaun

Now when people you know I tell people I'm a teacher and they say oh bless you for being a teacher or a middle school teacher right because I taught middle school for for a number of years so bless you for being a middle school teacher and I always think in the back of my head I'm not doing anything compared to sped teachers like oh SPED teachers for everything they do because my goodness that is take the hardest job in the world and double it.

Rochelle

Yes yes spent was a an adventure it really was um paperwork. Um just oh goodness but yeah I got out nearby where are you going I need a break man just need a break um then middle school math so but now um trying to transition into tutoring um especially online. Um since it was so successful and um looking into going into like a a mindfulness journey to help teachers as well so just trying to kind of help everybody I guess that's the teacher in me.

Shaun

Yeah you sometimes can't choose what to do it's we want to help everybody.

Rochelle

Right we do we definitely do we do.

Shaun

I love how you are getting in into tutoring and if I remember correctly you want to really help the Gap in math that's developed with students.

Rochelle

Yes um especially in middle school I'm in Texas I didn't realize that um a lot of um other states still had pre-algebra um in Texas we don't have pre-algebra of course so in middle school so you get to sixth grade they stretch pre-algebra through sixth through eighth grade so then you have those the parents are like oh my my child did so well in fifth grade I don't know what's going on well they're learning a lot of new strategies and um I love having small groups are one-on-one to build those connections especially with tutoring not really going going off being more creative instead of just being on a curriculum and maybe it's going to fast in the classroom. So I def... and then of course the pandemic with the the larger academic Gap in math.

Shaun

Yeah that that's fantastic I'm all for for tutoring especially for teachers who want to you know give that time to really help more students I think that's a fantastic uh fantastic choice but I mean you're now teaching and wanting to tutor so there's a lot to balance right?

Rochelle

Yes it is, it definitely is. And the crazy part is one of my best friends

I was trying to figure if I want to go do real estate I wanted to be a yoga instructor I didn't know if I wanted to do uh baking but baking was just my stress really but I was like I don't know what I want to do um to just find I don't know if it was like a hobby or just find something that a kind of balance all the crazy and so my friend said okay don't think about it what do you love doing and I said I love tutoring I really really do I like have the AHA moments and the kids really understanding it and building helping them understand building the connections and understanding so yeah I'm trying to I'm like okay I'm gonna take a lot of stuff off the plate but um I have found a way of making sure I still spend time with my family still tutor and work my my as a interventionist as well and still take time for me.

Shaun

Yes you know I any good teacher knows that when you find a nugget you need to need to follow it you don't want to just blow past it in the lesson right so we weren't going to talk about this but I really loved how you talked about how you found somebody and you were throwing ideas at them and trying to figure it out right? Um when I was trying to figure out what I wanted to do I had a friend who's like well why don't you just do this like like it's like I was like oh I could do this I could do that like when I was going to college and they're like well why don't you just do history because you love history which is what I teach now it's like oh yeah I just having that person there to be the sound board for you like if you are struggling talk to somebody you other people are so helpful. I just I think that's a fantastic little little nugget um that can help teachers have a better life you know a richer life we're trying to do. So you have all this stuff to balance how did you get interested in this work-life balance because you want to talk about mindfulness for teachers as well what Drew your interest to that topic?

Rochelle

Well um and at first I was the teacher that I didn't want anyone to think that I was slacking off like I can do it all I'm Superwoman at home I'm Superwoman at work I I can do it um and I didn't like asking for help because you know if you ask for help then you're that teacher that always asks for help um but um when I was about 30 33 um I was they were saying they were they wanted to put me on the blood pressure medication and one of my and I just broke down to one of my co-workers one day and I was like oh they want me they wanted us to you know they they want they think I have high blood pressure I'll be on this medicine forever and she said okay I'm gonna save your life and you to this day we still joke about it but she did because we start walking during lunch. Um and we would talk and it was so crazy like that 30 minutes of just walking around the campus or if it was a nice day out we would walk outside together um and I was like okay I need this. I need to be able to ask people for help. Um I was the sixth grade team lead and you know you hear when everybody's venting and so I was like okay well I just looked at everyone especially after that I was like you know what what how can I help you like what what do you need how are you feeling and so those that just that question opened up all these teachers because they're like okay wait so you're feeling that way like when you get home you don't want to talk to your people at your family at home because you have all this stuff so what are you doing differently some teachers are like well I'll just I'll drive the long way home go get a cookie and I'm like really like you do that you know like that's taking time from your kids but they were like well it's um it's so I can prepare myself for home so I can actually leave work where it is. Um so that's what made me say you know what we need this as teachers the work life balance because you know they say oh well this is your superpower teaching is your superpower and that's fine and dandy but even a superhero needs a day y'all like or time to himself or or herself you know so I made up I made a plan right then and there with my team and it was what goes on in sixth grade stays in sixth grade. Um we developed more like walking together um you could vent about different things that were going on at work at home and it stayed in that in that room and we made and we plan okay well let's have a buddy system if I couldn't check on you someone else was gonna check on you or if you had um like you just you just having one of those days and if I was off fourth period just send a student oh miss uh Carr is having a bad day or Miss Carr says she needs you I knew okay let me step in I'll give you five or ten minutes take a couple of deep breaths and keep it moving. And I think like you said we all need someone to talk to and you should be able to talk to your co-workers um without someone going oh you'll be okay or you know what that's your passion but actually say hey I understand and this is what helped me get through that and and we definitely need that collaboration and understanding that we have to have a balance.

Shaun

I loved everything you just said there's so many golden pieces in there uh the The Walking thing I think is fantastic. I knew two teachers that would take a walk every lunch and uh they were they were great teachers they just did a fantastic job and I think that that's part of the reason they were able to be so great they were the they're the uh the teachers were just like the the bulwark of that um that grade level that they were the leaders of and I I really think that taking that time for themselves is huge and the reason I know that is because I wasn't taking my 30 minute lunch for myself right?

Rochelle

Right.

Shaun

If you see a teacher who's stressed out it's because they're not taking their 30-minute lunch right? Like our lunches are short don't fill it with grading right or in my case the side hustle right? Sometimes I'd try and like you know do a hustle or something on on my 30 minute lunch like take 30 minutes you need it right? You do you need the 30 minutes it's oh man not having that time really really can can hurt you. And then talking to your coworkers. If you are feeling overwhelmed at work they are too like it's just there's no way that they're not also feeling it so don't feel like oh I'm the only one that no one cares like everyone cares right we're all there uh to support each other so I think that's that's fantastic. So you mentioned a few ideas of how teachers can really bring that mindfulness into their um into their their teaching day what about their time how how do you think teachers can go about making sure their time is is more honored more sacred uh just having more of their own time uh what are your thoughts on that?

Rochelle

For me um there's different strategies and and habits and you have to make small changes. Um it's not going to happen overnight um especially in that in this field that we're in. But you have to set clear boundaries you you have to set clear boundaries like this is my time this is my space um and don't feel guilty about taking that time to yourself. You you deserve that time to yourself everyone else takes is able to take their time and you should be able to too. Um having a to-do list to stay organized. Um create a community with your co-workers where you can collaborate on on tasks. Um creating a system and routine is important. Um and I know one one thing that I had to start doing especially with setting boundaries is I used to always have the the email app on my phone so so it would notify me if I if someone sent me an email after work um on the weekend and it could be a parent it could be admin it could be my co-worker anyone and I would respond back you know not think anything of it but after a while they would just any time of the day on the weekend so I had to delete that app sometimes you have to delete it to set that boundary and say and put a um I put a a message like a reply message um we'll answer on on Monday or whatever when the day the day back to when we come back to work or what have you or out of the office. So those things would set those boundaries and they'll they'll start respecting your time that is yours. Um I told my sister she's a kindergarten teacher um she she was like well we were talking about mindfulness and she's like I don't have any time I don't have time. I said okay you get um you have a conference period she's like 45 minutes but I have to go grade I need to go make copies I need to go do all this I said yeah that's fine I said but if you just start taking five or ten minutes of that time just to take a breath or just say okay I'm gonna call my husband just to say hi I mean just anything that's not work related then you'll you might you'll be like okay I needed that five or ten minutes or maybe you can grow it to 20 minutes where you take most of your your your conference period. I know during our conference period that's what we're doing but at least take that that five or ten minutes to yourself because we all deserve that real break.

Shaun

I love that take five or ten minutes to yourself during your your confidence period. You know I've had this theory in my head for for many years that taking a break does not take away your time. And the way I know this is because if you are trying to like say like a whole paragraph without taking a breath it takes the same amount of time as if you take a breath at each period than if you're trying to like say the whole thing in one breath it's just try it sometime it it totally works and just taking that breath you'll get just as much done right?

Rochelle

Right that's true.

Shaun

Like you know I have only like three minutes I need to do this and do anything you're like moving like you know lightning fast and then you're you're not getting done any faster you're dropping things you're messing up like you just take a breath you're gonna get it done and you'll feel better at the end too I think that's that's huge having that that time that you say ah this is my time.

Rochelle

Yes

Shaun

Don't take that from me. And you know don't take work home with you don't take the emails home with you so important.

Rochelle

Yes

Shaun

That's important because I teach online like my primary communication with my students is via emails and they'll send me you know a message like you know eight nine o'clock at night and it'll send me another one and another one and sometimes I'll respond to that and be like this is rude stop it and so they can know that I have a boundary I'm not responding to you on purpose I will get to it later right? And you know it's like calling it out I mean like this is my time and you're trying to infringe on it has really helped build that boundary and I love your automated response idea because that way you don't even have to respond anyway I might have to take that one I love it.

Okay so we've talked about respecting your time which of course time is huge right I can't stress this enough that you know your time like this is the teacher money show but like time is money okay? So don't don't think that we're not talking about money we are because your time makes a difference especially because if you are burning yourself out as a teacher right you're not going to run the full you know 25 30 years or 35 years if you really want to go that that far in your teaching uh career there's so much left on the table money-wise right? Your pension only gets better the longer you stay you know assuming you have one um your your uh contributions to retirement plans only get better. Your salary only gets better. Uh you know you can say no to more things that they're trying to ask you to do because you've been there longer right? There's just there's a lot more power and money that can come with being able to run the the long term instead of burning out after 10 or 15 years and then switching careers because you just can't do it any longer so uh respecting your time matters a lot a lot in in teaching.

Now we've been talking a lot about self-care things right and I really don't like "self-care" when the administrator says here's a list of self-care yay we've done our HR required thing to help you be better. It's just oh it irks me so much like no yes but how would you define self-care and and why does this actually matter?

Rochelle

I feel like it matters um because if you're not um practicing self-care you will become stressed burned out um it affects you mentally and physically and I think that I'm a better wife a better mother and a teacher when I take better care of myself um I like I said I wasn't always on that side I thought that was ridiculous to take time for yourself because I got to keep working I gotta keep moving I I need to keep it going um but I'm able to function better when I get home I'm able to come home and say okay well tell me about your day instead of running away from them when they want to tell me about their day. Um or being in a grumpy mood or like I said before having high blood pressure which I don't now but it's because I'm taking care of myself and I'm listening to those I'm listening to those signs of okay it's time for you to really take care of yourself and and not just look at the checklist that they gave you.

Shaun

The checklist man it's just like...

Rochelle

It's ridiculous

Shaun

Uh so you said it helps you at home to to be a better wife a better mother I love that uh what are some things that you're doing self-care-wise so you you so you're going to walk is there anything else that you're doing to increase your mindfulness or improve your mental health?

Rochelle

I journal and reflect on the day um one thing that I do is I do positive um affirmations and it's just like I am worthy I'm just feeding myself positivity I am a good teacher I am um I am making a difference um and then also teaching others like I would teach the kids um mindfulness as well because then they'll understand other people if they're learning through that uh mindfulness um of course exercising reading a book that has nothing to do with work. I'm actually reading because I I've been just being able to get into that groove of um doing different things for for yourself to take care of you has been has been helpful. Um even before our class starts you can practice mindfulness uh mindfulness transition you can take a deep breath um think of a positive what could positively happen in the classroom not oh my goodness Here Comes John I know he's going to have a a bad day today but think like I am making an impact on this class I'm taking a deep breath this is my transition this is my break um and like I said journaling has really really been helpful for me and just reflecting on the day and different things that have gone on and look and being grateful for for what what I do have um and those are different things that I do throughout the day or try to do throughout the day.

Shaun

I love that um you know I just had two two thoughts here. How many times have we had one class that was just terrible so then we go into the next class with a bad mood right? And then that class is not going to go well because you have a bad mood right?

Rochelle

Right.

Shaun

You're setting the tone for the class so having that transition time is is huge it's not like self-care it's it's care for your students so if you're worried about I can't take time for myself and I'll do it for the kids right because we should all do it for the kids right it's going to be better for them.

Rochelle

I I had one I was at a a school and and but you know we would have in middle school they would have those five minutes to get to the class my kids knew if the door was closed and the light was off then that means I needed that whole not wouldn't take the whole five minutes per se but maybe just that two to three minutes y'all stand right here in the line or what have you or just come to the door okay and I would hear kids going oh miss Tyler just needs a minute because they knew like okay maybe it could have been the last class it could have been something else that happened but like we need that mindful transition between those classes or before for elementary kids um before the start of the day when they're coming back from Recess or they're coming back from um ancillary so we definitely need that

Shaun

Um yeah and that that's huge and then another thing I was thinking was about um you're saying doing these things throughout the day and uh you know growth mindset is of course like the watchword right now in education I don't think there's a single school that isn't you know putting up the sign with the fixed mindset growth mindset you know which we all have the same poster.

Rochelle

Yes.

Shaun

So what like what what principle would it be tickled pink for you to take those like you know two three minutes at the end of class when nothing's happening anyway for you to say all right we're all going to write out some positive affirmations and now that your students are writing out positive affirmations you can take time to write out positive affirmations right but we're all going to take some time to journal they're not going to be like you're not allowed to write like they want their students to write right? You know we're just going to take you know those three minutes that would have been wasted anyway writing you know journaling what's happened today positive affirmations take a moment to have some Zen time right we're all going to take a deep breath together doing these things and just because it goes as part of what they're wanting us to do with with the students ourselves instead of me like I have to do all of my self-care during my 45 minute conference you can also sprinkle it throughout the day when you have that you know extra time with your students or in a transition from one activity to the next like all right we're gonna do this uh we're finishing this let's take a you know a Zen breath together and let's move on to you know the next thing you can make that transition time and once again taking a breath gets you to the end of the paragraph at the same amount of time as running straight through so I think that those are fantastic uh suggestions you have there.

Rochelle

Yeah yeah I've been working on them um especially with um I think we were doing value circles and I wasn't too keen on them at first because I was like okay this is normal teacher this is going to take away from my classroom instruction they're not going to want to do this um but I had a student teacher in and one day I was like okay we're gonna do a value Circle so we can better understand each other like you know kids and adults anyone would change you know and we were all crying at the end of the value Circle because we didn't know what these kids were going through and mindfully uh listening to others like active and compassionate listening will let you know the why behind the anger the sadness the the the behavior that they're exhibiting at that moment and sometimes you have to just understand it it's probably not even about you um it could have been anything that happened throughout that day um so that when I started doing that it was like okay I'm gonna use this growth mindset I'm gonna build them gratitude journals like we're gonna we're gonna reflect we we're gonna do this for every class period and these were some hardcore kids and they were like Miss Tyler so when are we gonna do this again I'm like we're gonna do this every day this is what we're gonna do so the night when you get to your next class you'll be you'll be okay and when I get my next class I will be okay.

Shaun

Love it. Alright so we are getting close to the end of our conversation um we've talked a lot about work-life balance and mindfulness. Do you have any other tips nuggets of wisdom things that you've collected as you've gone on this mindfulness journey to share with our teacher listeners?

Rochelle

Okay I had to realize that taking time for yourself is so important when um when I first started teaching um in the district if I was at the charter school first and then at the district I felt like I grew up um I had 60 personal days I didn't want to use them because what if I needed it for a real emergency what if one of my kids were sick or my husband got sick anything like or I was sick and I was just holding on to these days and um so my on this journey I was like well I I have 60 days in my self-care taking care of me is important but of course you feel guilty because you're like okay well what about the sub what about um if the kids are not acting right for the sub oh well I I can't control that because taking care of myself or taking care of yourself as a teacher is a very important thing I took days where I was just hanging out with my husband because he was off that day or I just went to the movies by myself or or went and got my um my nails done um and that's and that's what you needed and then go back if the CL if the kids are acting up this is a teachable moment Miss Tyler needed a self-care day and I mean I'm not sharing what I did you know and we all need those so what happened in the classroom what you are supposed to do what you were supposed to do. So I'm doing what I need to do so I can be mentally ready for the class and um just respect that and then after a while my kids knew and I would tell them before I would leave which I know some teachers don't surprise you what's up but I would I'm like okay I'm communicating this to you. Well miss Tyler are you sick? No I just need a day. Okay be good and then when I come back it was I was better I was a better teacher for them by taking that day that I needed off. So I guess that's my my last.

Shaun

Take a day off. There we go, take a day off.

Rochelle

Take your days do not hold on to those days.

Shaun

Yeah I know that finding a sub was awful but yeah I love it you know I think that's huge that a mental health day is is a fantastic idea it's allowed okay?

Rochelle

It is

Shaun

You can take a mental health day you know that's mental health is health so there you go take a mental health day.

Rochelle

And and then communicate with your your co-workers if we're already if you build that collaboration um Community with your with your team even if they don't have a sub I've already I'm telling you I'm taking a mental health day here's the assignments and they might I had one where she would text me like hey didn't get a sub for you okay everyone everything's on the desk remember what I told you yesterday. So just kind of preparing them and if we have that team like um we know that if if Miss Tyler is having a mental health day today and Mr Morgan needs one tomorrow or or next week we're okay because we're all looking out for each other as a team.

Shaun

Yeah that that's awesome and just if you're taking a mental health day be aware because this happened to me I took a mental health day and apparently a student of mine also took a mental health day and we both met at the same place because I went there with my family he went there with his family and we're like hey we didn't mention it at school but we both saw each other like neither of us are sick but we're not in school like we're supposed to be so it could happen but.

Rochelle

Yes they take mental health days too.

Shaun

So you know you can take a mental health day just be aware that could happen though all right uh two more questions for you uh what is your number one tip for teachers to have a richer wallet classroom and life?

Rochelle

Just find your own balance and whatever that looks like for you. Um like for me my balance is okay? Yes I'm tutoring I know how many hours that I can tutor or I'm available to tutor I'm making sure that my kids and my husband have time we have time together as well I'm communicating with everyone um and I think that just taking care of yourself putting you first is not being selfish to put you first. You're you're taking care of yourself and you can find your balance you can find your balance and you will definitely have a richer wallet uh classroom and life you definitely will if you just just whatever works for you and build your community build your community I'm telling you like teachers we might if we don't say anything to each other we don't know that we're feeling the same way and we can help each other. We can definitely some a lot of teachers want to help the other teachers you know so I feel like that's that's the way just find find your own balance and take care of you you have to take care of yourself so you can be here for your family and you can work until retirement you know you're not forced to retire.

Shaun

I love it. It's not selfish to take care of yourself. Words of wisdom take care of yourself. That's fantastic all right my last question for you Rochelle where can people you know find more information about you? Where can teachers connect with you or I don't know refer a student to you for tutoring if they're like man they're they really need help in math?

Rochelle

Okay so I just created and it was just this is crazy I just realized how I can really get my do yoga and mindfulness I created a Facebook group called teach and thrive finding balance as educators and um I just I want to make I want to build a website like I want to do yoga classes all online, journals and products for your classrooms to help you out um and then also um email is at AskMissTyler@gmail.co

Shaun

Alright awesome so if you go to our uh our website uh you can find that on the uh show notes for this uh show I'll put a link to those those two things so you can reach out to uh Miss Tyler if you have any questions for her and you want to learn more about mindfulness all right thank you so much Rochelle it's great having you.

Rochelle

Thank you it was great being here.

Shaun

If you'd like to come on the podcast for coaching to share an expert opinion or just to talk about a topic you think is relevant I'd love to talk to you just spill out the form at teachermoneyshow.com/Guest I look forward to talking with you.